‘Melania’ Review: Brett Ratner’s First Lady Documentary is a Cheeseball Infomercial of Straggering Inertia

"Melania" is a documentary that never comes to life. It’s a "portrait" of the First Lady of the United States, but the movie is so orchestrated and airbrushed and stage-managed that it barely rises to the level of a shameless infomercial. Is it cheesy? At moments, but mostly it’s inert. It feels like it’s been stitched together out of the most innocuous outtakes from a reality show. There’s no drama to it. It should have been called "Day of the Living Tradwife."